A Youdiv poll in the wake of the recent burka controversy has revealed overwhelming support from an unlikely source – the elderly. It was widely expected that there would be opposition and calls for a ban from the traditionally conservative older generation, but it didn’t work out that way.  “We expected quite a bit of hostility

Promoter Eddie Hearn confirmed last night that contracts have been signed on the long awaited clash between Ben Stokes and Danny Cipriani. The fight will take place on October 17th outside a shitty Billericay nightclub, just behind the burger van. “Everyone has been waiting for this one after both men impressed on their most recent

  Thousands of youngsters, destined for the call centre intake of 2022, were still celebrating last night after yet another year of record A’ level results. The teenagers are all thrilled to have won a place at their chosen University, and fully expect to move on to a well-paid career. But research, somewhat ironically carried

  The oldest living Glaswegian was celebrating  this week, after reaching the big 4-0. Andy McTavish (40) reached the milestone on Monday, and the occasion was marked by a surprise party attended by his children, grandchildren and carers. Andy, who puts his longevity down to clean living, good genetics and not starting smoking or drinking

  Pub chain Wetherspoons have issued a profits warning this morning following yesterday’s announcement that UK unemployment has fallen by 65,000 in the last quarter to 1.36 million – its lowest  level since 1975. A spokesperson for the chain said “This is a massive blow for us, and one we can’t absorb without taking a

  Tinseltown was celebrating last night after it was rumoured that Damian Lewis is set to become the first openly ginger James Bond. “This is a massive breakthrough,” said Tom Redhead from Ginger Mingers, an organisation set up to promote equal rights for gingers in cinema, theatre and the arts. “Who would have thought just

  Social services were called this afternoon after a family from Rotherham dragged their two children aged 6 and 4, out of the family home, and into a tin box abandoned in a windswept field somewhere near Skegness. The family, who can’t be named for legal reasons, decamped from their luxury brick built property in

  House Of Fraser last night announced that, following the takeover by Sports Direct, the company will be launching a new range of luxury Scrotewear for the 2019 season. The range is expected to include shapeless hoodies, baggy tracky bottoms, and a variety of oversized laceless trainers with primary coloured highlights. A spokesperson for the

  The campaign to make the Burka a compulsory item of clothing in Barnsley, was gathering pace tonight.  Following an unprecedented push which has united the left, the right and those who don’t give a shit, a 100,000 signature petition was handed into Barnsley town hall, where it was received by the lady Mayoress, Sylvia

  It was hailed as a safe alternative to smoking, but now a new report has revealed that vaping isn’t as risk-free as it was first thought. The report from the University of North East Barnsley found that far from being harmless, vaping in a public place leaves you at serious risk of being labelled