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2024-05-08

Women Don’t Enjoy Spending Entire Theatre Interval In Piss Queue, New Research Reveals



New research from the Institute Of Women’s Stuff in Barnsley is set to turn what was previously thought to be common knowledge, on its head. Contrary to what was previously thought, women do not look forward to spending the entire interval at the theatre or other event, standing in a queue of strangers discussing their menstrual cycles while waiting for one of the three cubicles to become available so they can have a piss.

“It came as a real surprise to us” said Ed Bloke who headed up the study “They always look cheerful enough to me, when I walk past and go straight in the gents. In fact I’ve sometimes gone back ten minutes later for another one, just to be on the safe side, and they’re still there. Why would you stay if you weren’t enjoying it?”

A spokesperson for women everywhere said “It really boils my piss, which isn’t good when you need to go. The blokes could have a dance in there and we’re queuing down the  bastard stairs. It would be nice to get a drink or an ice cream or something, but no chance. It’s not all bad though, we went on holiday with a woman I met in a piss queue last year, and another is godmother to my daughter.”

The new research is likely to change the way toilet facilities are designed and allocated at public venues in the future. Or maybe it won’t.

 



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