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2024-05-09

What ‘Alternative Arrangement’?…Said Everyone


The country was united in bewilderment this evening as MP’s voted through an amendment to the Brexit deal, recommending an ‘alternative arrangement’ to the Irish backstop.

Naïve observers, including this reporter, were intrigued to hear what this alternative arrangement was when the amendment was tabled earlier today. But they were to be disappointed. Astonishingly, it soon emerged that there is no idea for an alternative arrangement as such – just a feeling that it would be rather nice, on the whole and taking everything into account, if we had one.

A spokesperson for everyone said “What are these idiots on? An alternative arrangement to poverty or cancer is a nice thing to put on a five year olds wish list but it’s not really solving the problem, now is it?”

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