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The Rotherham Bugle

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2024-05-05

Charity Urges Young People To Check Out Elderly Neighbours Food Supplies As Bad Weather Continues


 

As the ‘Beast From The East’ maintained it’s icy grip, young people  were being urged to check on elderly neighbours food supplies today as it emerged that the crafty old buggers horde the snap like you wouldn’t believe. The fridges, freezers and pantries of the over 70’s are an Aladdin’s cave for people who can’t be arsed put their wellies on, de-ice the car and go to the shops.

Giles Cadger from Brinsworth is typical of some of the people we spoke to this week. “I went round to my 90 year old neighbour, ostensibly to see if she was all right.” he said “While she was putting the kettle on, I had a quick shufty around and managed to snaffle a couple of loaves, some milk and loads of tinned stuff. I was a bit put out because they weren’t the brands I normally buy and some of the tinned fruit went out of date before the millennium, but it’s better than nowt.”

A spokesperson for Help The Aged said “It’s true, they’ve got more food than they know what to do with. I blame Harvest Festivals and bloody do-gooders. People should fill their boots. Most pensioners have enough Werthers Originals and shortbread biscuits in stock to keep them going until Spring anyway.”

 

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