The financial world descended into panic last night after the mysterious creator of Bitcoin finally broke cover and admitted he was just buggering about.
The development of the Crypto currency, which has billions of dollars invested in it throughout the world, has been previously attributed to someone using the name Satoshi Nakamoto, thought to be a technological wizard living in Japan. However, speculation about the true identity of Nakamoto has mostly focused on a number of computer experts of non-Japanese descent, living in the United States and mainland Europe.
However, The Bugle has discovered that the truth is a little closer to home. Barry Turner, a Co-op checkout operator from Goldthorpe admits he created the coin back in 2008 while messing about on his home computer after a game of Grand Theft Auto. “I was just buggering about really.” he told us “I wondered what it would be like if you could just create your own money out of f**k all with nothing of any value whatsoever backing it up. I banged out some bollocks about these coins being digitally mined – nice touch for Goldthorpe I thought – and called it Bitcoin after my initials Barry Ian Turner. I made up Satoshi Nakamoto because it sounded like a character from Ninja Warriors and more plausible than Barry Turner from Goldthorpe. I didn’t expect anybody to take it seriously – but they did.”
Asked whether he’d kept some of the coins for himself, Barry laughed “You’re not getting this are you?” he said “There’s nothing for me to keep, they don’t exist. I’ve got all my money in the Halifax. It’s just a giant bubble that could be burst with a little prick. I think I could be that prick.”